Howdy everybody. New DBT posting. Yeehaw!
Today the smog was really bad in LA. All I could think about on my commute in my (gasp!) SUV was getting a hybrid and how I said I'd keep my car for two more years but I totally want a hybrid right now.
One of my brothers sent me a note, I'm assuming in response to my blog discussing my dad. It was sweet and good to hear from him. And, his note left me feeling a little defensive. In essence it said that I am still carrying a grudge and I just have to let go, etc, and that no amount of yoga or meditation will fix it for me. What do I say to that? Ummm... Okay?? Thank you??
Here's the thing - I'm so far from perfect. I get that. I struggle with honesty, being judgmental, I ate five cookies for dinner last night, etc. But the pure intentions of the heart are always granted. And so despite my repeated imperfections I trust that as I continue to put one foot in front of the other and well, pay attention as best I can, I suspect that the shortcomings will be less frequent. What does it look like to be totally free of all these human foibles? I have no idea. I'm less bothered with the fact that I have them than I am with the expectation that I shouldn't have them. That is all.