chiller / November 7, 2007 by vanessa

I forgot to mention that when Dre and I went to see Darjeeling last weekend, this guy had a seizure. This lady sitting next to him (friend? fellow patron?) started freaking out and running up the aisle yelling, "Call 911! Someone's having a seizure!" Lady, this is LA. An earthquake wouldn't shake people from their seats. No one did anything. I mean, someone must've called 911 b/c the paramedics eventually came but mostly people (including me) kept watching. I'm sorry in advance to anyone who has seizures. I'm about to reveal my ignorance (as if were hidden): so the guy has a seizure and I'm really into the movie, and I'm thinking, well, when's the last time someone died from a seizure? Who dies from seizures? No one. (I haven't medically or statistically validated this perception, of course.) Ergo, not that big of a deal. As it turned out, he eventually snapped out of it, and by the time the medics got there, the movie was over. Seriously it took them forever. Thank God he didn't get his arm caught in a chainsaw or something. Anyway, interesting story and as I said, it turned out he was fine. (No hate mail please.)

***

My improv performance is Sunday at 1:30pm at www.ucbtheatre.com/la. Eight weeks has culminated to this very event. It's five bucks at the door and if you come see me I'll buy you a beer afterwards. One of us will need it, I assure you.

Now that my class is over, I'm thinking of taking 101 all over again. I don't feel like I'm good enough to get to 201 yet. I don't even know what it would look like to be qualified for 201 but I'm sure it doesn't look like these unfunny bones.

long time no blog / November 6, 2007 by vanessa

I really have had a lot to talk about but nothing to say. So, some quick hits because I'm no closer to being inspired tonight than I have been in the last month.

1. Go see The Darjeeling Limited. This may just be my favorite Wes Anderson flick yet. Less quirky, more mature than his previous, and yet just as sweet.

2. Yoga workshop last weekend at City Yoga where we learned Hands On Adjustments. Naturally this is interesting for me given my background assisting. I definitely learned some new tricks but my very favorite thing was learning how to fall. Yep, that's right -- we spent a good 45 minutes learning how to fall out of handstand, pinchu mayurasana, and headstand. Basically I got that my back didn't break, which is what I'd assumed would happen should I ever fall while upside down. The instructor's theory is that if we take the fear of falling, we'll practice more, and if we practice more eventually we'll get so sick of falling we'll just stay up, and voila, handstand. Okay, I'll bite.

3. Tonight was my last improv class. On Sunday we have our performance. Going in, I didn't know if this would help me in public speaking. I'm gonna say it has. Tonight I pretty much sucked it and still I can see vast improvements in my ability to speak extemporaneously. Despite my nerves, I'm going to take the next level. Now if they only held a class that was like Improv and Hip Hop. Or Improv and Pole Dancing. Something along those lines.

4. Happy Birthday, Spitchy!

catch up / October 23, 2007 by vanessa

New DBT post!!! Read it and then submit your own questions. Seriously, April and I are really good at this shit. And, we're exceedingly modest.

***

Tonight I had Improv. Is it possible to get *less* funny as time goes on? Yes? Yay! I'm excelling at something.

***

Early morning tomorrow, but just a quick note about a topic that came up at my company's annual meeting as an issue we need to address -- cliques. My two cents: First, if you identify yourself as part of a clique, and you think it's kinda cool, you're retarded. Junior High for Adults is hardly something to aspire to. Second, if you want to be in a clique and you're concerned you're not part of the cool crowd or whatever, (hint: you're complaining that there are cliques), quit being so needy. That is all.

the bugaloos / October 2, 2007 by vanessa

Week 3 of Improv-a-mania. You people said you wanted blow by blow, right? Maybe I made that up. Anyway, tonight wasn't any easier, but at least now I notice patterns in other peoples' scenes which gives me hope that I may one day clue into my own. (I sound like such an ahh-ctress, dah-ling.) Speaking of acting, I keep hearing the suggestion that I should consider acting classes. I'm resisting it with every fiber in my being for the sole, lame reason that I don't want to be one of THOSE girls. What does that mean, anyway? Maybe taking acting classes while you live in LA is akin to being a barista when you live in Seattle -- everyone's gotta do it before they leave. What'd be great is if I didn't take the acting classes but instead just pretended like I did. When people caught on to me for not actually taking a class I can be all like, No, see, I was pre-TENDING. Get it? "Pretending," like I was "acting" see...

Just a little bit more about my improv class -- I am SO out-hipped. First of all, I always come directly from work with my work clothes on and no time to change (unfair disadvantage), which means I'm basically the Felix Unger of Improv 101. Tonight I almost wore a sign reading: I like cool bands too, but I didn't. Might look like I'm trying too hard. Second, our teacher frequently plays out how OUR scenes *should have* gone in his head, 'cept for he says it out loud. I appreciate the humor - I mean, he IS funny, after all. What I most like though is the long pretend sparring matches he has with himself. He's there, playing both sides, both invisible characters equally cutting, yet he goes on as if it's totally normal to be talking to yourself. I realized tonight though that it IS totally acceptable to talk to yourself on the condition that what you have to say is funny.

***

I'm so tired and I still have a bunch of work to do tonight. Why blog then? Classic stalling. Next is a myspace sweep.

Week 2 / September 26, 2007 by vanessa

Holy shit I am NOT funny. This improv bidness is a mug.

Aside from the problem that I'm uhh, not funny, I'm also totally lost. There's this thing where we're supposed to identify patterns in a scene and then work that pattern. Pattern? Huh? Do I get an Excel spreadsheet or something?

In case you're wondering, I'm taking this class so I can get better at public speaking and thinking on my feet, etc. Why didn't I take Toastmasters, you might ask? Oh I don't know. I guess I like a little drama in my life. 2 down, 6 to go.