my outfit sucked today. / by vanessa

Tonight, on Amherst (true story)
Me: Dude I had the ugliest outfit on today.
Dre: (Shocked) Why?! Why would you do that to yourself?
Me: I don't know?! Every once in a while I just have a miss.
Dre: Dude that happens to me ALL the time.


So, for real -- I did have the worst outfit on. And I have rubbed off all my eyelashes out of one eye - again - so I look like a ... (insert malaise-stricken simile). In short, I was smokin'.

It started out all wrong: I bought a new shirt which I didn't try on b/c it looked cute on the hanger, I know my size, and, oh yeah, I NEVER try anything on. Ever. I'd prefer to let the ill-fitting item sit in my closet until the sales people are pissed that they have to give me a full refund when they don't even sell it anymore. Anyway, I paired the brown shirt w/ these green pants and light blue ballet flats... all, in theory, a good match. Except they weren't. At all.

It's not even like I have a good excuse (can't see) -- I have full length mirrors. Sadly, I even did the once-over and somehow still made it out the door. And then I got to work and it hit me around 10 a.m. when I went to the powder room: Seriously? You wore *that*? Nice. I couldn't even turn around (though I wanted to) and go home. Nope, for the rest of the day, I suffered in my chair, shuddering to look at my reflection in the back of my iPod. I held my bladder hours past wise counsel to avoid that same offending mirror. By the end of the day, fully shamed, I had Christine hold up her coat to cover me as we walked to the garage together. She's nice like that.

Okay I might be exaggerating *slightly* but for real, I'm going to have to pull it together tomorrow if I'm to keep a sartorial slump at bay.


That's all I gots.