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POSTED ON BY vanessa

My friend and I were just talking about how boring it is to write about yourself. Apparently I’m not bored enough, though I am sensitive and will be brief.
Two things going on my brain right now — first that I taught tonight and had so much fun. I was pretty funny (and modest). Actually I don’t really know how it went for sure, but I had a good time and I think that’s related to my new approach of being an open student — when I find myself judging a teacher, just staying open. My theory is that being the kind of student you’d want to have in class (i.e. open, receptive) makes you a better teacher. Note: mealy doesn’t make for a good student. You still have to be honest. So my motivation may not smack of altruism, okay, I see. This is just where I’m at right now.

Second, my friend and I were talking about going to Thailand. Actually we were discussing going to Hawaii but then she suggested Thailand and why would I disagree? Anyway, so we haven’t booked our tickets yet or even figured out WHAT YEAR we’re going, and she gets this call last night from her mom. Deft eavesdropper that I am, I quickly figured out that her mom was *not* happy about our not-even-scheduled trip. I could hear my friend arguing about the fact that everyone in her business school has been to Thailand and that it is too safe and that [her mom] was overreacting. Thank God, I thought — glad this isn’t my problem. Then my friend hangs up the phone, turns to me and says:
“She thinks it’s your fault.”
“What?”
“She thinks it’s your fault. She said, ‘You only want to go to Thailand b/c Vanessa wants to go.’”
“Uhh what? Dude I didn’t even suggest Thailand! You did!”
My friend agreed. I do not recall her arguing *this* point with her mom but I was sitting six inches away so maybe I missed it.
Even that’s not what bothers me though. Her mom doesn’t want her to go to Thailand, I’m guessing, and when she doesn’t get her way because my friend is still planning on going, she turns her anger towards someone else — me.
It may sound like I’m whining, and okay, I am. But really this was a good reminder of the times that I’ve misdirected my anger at some undeserving person (a recent class comes to mind). It’s good every once in a while to have the tables turned to raise my antennae towards my own tendencies.

About vanessa

Some say narcissist; I say solipsist. View all posts by vanessa → CATEGORIES Uncategorized. PERMALINK.

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Vanessa Fiola