just a girl from kent / by vanessa

Ominous news at my company... we got a last minute email today stating that tomorrow night we have a mandatory, all-company meeting. Now, since we were all just together two weeks ago in Palm Springs, I'm thinking this is big news. (Call me quick.)


Thanks, KRISTIN, (not) for getting me hooked on The Hills. Wtf? It's seriously a show about absolutely nothing.

I'll give you a rendition of a typical Lauren/Whitney conversation. Read slowly. (Alternatively, you could leave your computer screen right now and go watch paint dry. You'll see more action.)

Lauren (walks in shared office, sits down): "Hey Whitney."
Whitney (sitting behind desk): "Hey Lauren."
*silence* *Lauren rubs her lips together to even out the lip gloss.* *Whitney twirls her hair**more silence**still, more silence and not in the Buddha kinda way*.

THAT'S the show. I'm not even kidding. And yet, I watched SEVEN episodes of Season 3 this weekend after Kristin assured me, "it's SOOOO good." Not only is it not good, but I hate myself for watching it again. And again. And again. (I'm actually going to have to watch a couple of more so I can see the season finale. Can't miss that!)

My take on the show's "characters":

Lauren: You spend WAY too much energy making the point that you hate Heidi.
Audrina: Fire your dentist, dude. Your teeth are comically white.
Whitney: I kinda like your shyness. KINDA.
Heidi: Needy.
Stephanie: Who raised you?
Spencer: Ditto.
And, my least favorite person on the show...
Lo: Hater.

Okay, off to spread my curmudgeonry to my dreams.