deep blue sea / by vanessa

Touche. I returned from lunch today with the following note on my chair:

We don’t mean to be disrespectful, but the use of your speakerphone on a continuous basis has caused disruption to the teams in your area. Complaints have arisen from as far as three aisles away.

It is common for most people working in this heavy traffic areas to inquire about obtaining a Hands Free Headset or utilizing conference rooms when possible. Please speak to your project manager to inquire about obtaining a hands free device or conference room space.

At first I felt sad. (Oh dear, they hate me.) Then I felt paranoid. (Were they all IM'ing each other, waiting for me to go to lunch? "Coast is clear. Hurry before she comes back!" Which call pushed it over the edge?) Then I felt angry. (Oh yeah?! Well you don't hear me complaining about those stuffed squawking monkeys you throw around whose shrills sound like chickens being tortured with a butter knife.) And now I find it kinda funny after my last blog and all, this happens... It feels sort of like I just got served a piece of karma pie. So I ordered the headset and now that I don't feel any emotion around it, I realize that one's responsibility is to be cool, period. And the monkeys, etc. don't give me license to have a zillion conference calls on speakerphone just because I don't want to hold the phone to my ear.


Dre is about to embark on an 8-week detox diet. Dude, this is like heaven to me. I've been waiting for this day for oh, about the past 7 years, where SHE asks ME to do a cleanse. I'm giddy.