23 / by vanessa

Hello. My name is Vanessa and I am a compulsive hair twirler. It started in infancy and was coupled with thumb-sucking. I retired the thumb-sucking around age 10, but haven't been able to shake the twirling. And oh I've been shamed at work many times for my addiction. One girl I worked with told me that she'd read that hair twirling is a form of masturbation. I'm pretty sure she wanted me.

I'd never considered quitting until I noticed a charater on TV looping her hair around her fingers, much as I do. Had she been someone cool, my fate would have been much different. Instead, her action struck me as distracting and unstable. And so I've been trying to curb my compulsion which I liken to kicking heroin because I literally play with my hair hundreds of times a day. Today I felt so frustrated by my tendency that I literally thought of getting it all cut off. Too bad I couldn't just take some methodone or put cayenne pepper on it.

This is how I post when I'm really really tired and have to get up in the morning early for an all day meeting.